Q:You play Dragon Age too!? Big fan of Bioware here! (And yeah, the option to sell Fenris back is just... I couldn´t even do that option when I was playing a more evil Hawke. The whole scenario is just disturbing to me.)
YES I DO. :D AND MASS EFFECT. I LOVE BOTH SERIES, WOW WOW. <3 I actually was in the MERP comm on tumblr for a long time.
The fact that you can sell Fenris back into slavery will always distress me that is all.
And I think Anders actually approves? That is so horrible. No. No. I can’t handle that particular character choice. Bad. No.
I should write more Bioware rants when I'm on my period.
- Sylver: also i hate everything. just read a 'what bioware needs to do with dragon age 3' thing and one of the sections was nothing but "wah wah we need STRAIGHT ONLY ROMANCES everyone being bi is UNREALISTIC - WHAT ABOUT THE STRAIGHT PEEEOOOPPLEEEE???!?!?1/1one"
- Sylver: shut the hell up, you are an idiot and let me tell you why
- Sylver: 1) you completely contradict yourself, saying "omg give us all the pretty armor RPG players want to customize/do EVERYTHING THEIR OWN WAY," and then "but no we can't have bi love interests because that's like a WEIRD SLASH FANFICTION LOL"
- Sophia: SHUT UP IDIOTS
- Sylver: 2) Making everyone bi would actually be easier and time-saving for writers and developers, and very little would actually need to change you can use the same dialogue even for chrissakes, it's not like writing a same-sex romance is a SPECIAL MAGICAL CREATURE that is SO DIFFERENT from a straight one that it needs to be reinvented from the ground up and is unrecognizable and nothing but GAY GAY GAY GAY LOL LOOK AT US WE'RE GAY, shut up
- Sylver: 3) the "weird slash fanfiction" crack completely alienates and erases the existence of *gasp* ACTUAL QUEER GAME PLAYERS, making the whole thing sound like some straight fangirl's fantasy (and really, what the hell is wrong with that? Not to the extent of fetishizing gay guys, that's dehumanizing as fuck and gross too. But videogames are already 99% straight fanboy fantasies, who do that with lesbians already.)
- Sylver: 4) You're a homo/bi-phobic idiot, shut the fuck up.
- Sylver: 5) shut
- Sylver: 6) the
- Sylver: 7) fuck
- Sylver: 8) up
- Sophia: and I would just like to refer back to that thing about the straight fangirl fantasies because IT IS ACTUALLY SO RARE FOR THINGS TO EXPLICITLY CATER TO WOMEN'S FANTASIES. SO. RARE.
- Sylver: I KNOW. hot damn i should write more when i'm on my period. i am an eloquent angry bitch.
- Sophia: you are. put it on tumblr.
You know what else we need? Dragon Age Tarot.
It already has a Hanged Man.
the el dorado/dragon age ii crossover is not my idea by any means obviously i just wanted to doodle tulio!hawke and miguel!anders ahahaha fuck
someday i will draw chell!fenris
I am squealing
CHEL!FENRIS NEEDS TO BE A THING RIGHT THE FUCK NOW RIGHT NOW RIGHT NOW NOW NOW give him the goddamn earrings~ (Zevran!Chel?)
Ignoring the fact that Isabela would make the most incredibly perfect Chel ever and are they actually the same person? I think they might be.
This crossover just needs to happen, okay, it needs to happen. Tzekel-Khan (BLOOD MAGERY!) and Chief Tannanbok are Orsino and Merideth (except Tanni’s not, you know, psychotic). No, okay, CORTEZ is Merideth. Tanni’s Aveline. The Mabari is Altivo.
Merrill is, obviously, the armadillo.
Idek who Varric would be. :c He can be the storyteller, telling everyone this weird story. At the Hanged Man.
"Did I ever tell you about these two crazy con-men I once knew? Kinda reminded me of you guys. So the story goes, they were gods once, but certain facets of their story might have been… exaggerated…"
The Tale of Sylver’s First Stupid Hawke
My very first playthrough of Dragon Age 2, I did a custom Hawke. Red spiky hair, stubble - and he coincidentally came out looking pretty much MODEL-IDENTICAL to the street punk who nicks Hawke’s money in Varric’s first scene.
If you watch that opening scene, first you see him (the punk) sitting on the ground, watching people. And I was like “oh hey it’s my Hawke, lookin’ fine” and then it switches to Bethany/Carver and Actual Hawke talking, which confused me because wasn’t he just sitting over there?
And naturally it gets weirder, because of course in a few seconds, MY HAWKE IS NOW GETTING ROBBED BY HIMSELF. He is watching his identical twin get pinned to a wall and smacked around by a dwarf.
Needless to say, this… rather confused me. I seriously thought it was a game glitch at first. (Well, I HAD bought my copy pre-owned.)
TA-DAAAHHH. Now you know the story of Sylver’s First Stupid Hawke who looks exactly like a redheaded street punk, and it is now my headcanon that he actually has appeared as that punk in every subsequent playthrough, giving my future Hawkes a hard time.
And maybe he’s in yours too.
Can you feel him? Can you feel my Doppleganger Hawke in your games? He’s there. Watching. Always.
… And with that, I say good night.
And now, for my friend Sylver and for shits and giggles, a completely unfitting Dragon Age 2 tribute.
what am I looking at
I DON’T UNDERSTAND
BUT I LOVE IT. WHAT IS GOING ON.
Although - dude, you’ve never even played dA, have you? My gosh. How did you. even. This is ODDLY FITTING, with Fenris at least, because he, uh, actually is an ex-slave, so. KIND OF A FITTING SONG CHOICE?
what even. I just. am staring and. brain breaking and. what.
<3 You’re awesome. You are insane, and your brain does things my brain does not understand, but you are awesome and thank you for this strange, strange present.
“you will never take another mage as you took him!”
One of many reasons why I ship Anders/Karl mega-hard. (Well. Aside from the fact that they were canonically together. I love it when my OTPs are at least temporarily canon.)
I just. Hnfnngh. ;_; I know it was over by that point in the universe’s timeline, but I just love them. And that they so obviously still cared very deeply for one another.
My headcanon of Karl as a deeply passionate, eccentric, adorkable, excitable, emotional, hotheaded but ultimately optimistic and romantic (in both senses) guy just makes it hurt even more. Nobody deserves Tranquility, but especially not the laughing, vibrant man my imagination conjures up.
So when I was drawing Karl and Irving, it occurred to me that if the Blight had struck 10-15 years or so earlier, Karl could very well have been the one chosen to join the Wardens. And then I realized that the adventures of twenty-something Warden Karl and thirty-something Duncan and teenage runaway Anders were a thing I needed in my life, if only for a moment.
And then I drew this, when I should be doing homework. Call it a warm-up, I guess.
hawkeward has a way with aus that makes me think “why did i never come up with that” and also “hey, can i just…live in your head please? in a place where karl is wearing warden blue and sparkle-fingering and he’s got anderfels freckles and that pale complexion, and maybe anders is tagging along with earrings still, and there’s a moment when he looks at duncan and duncan looks at him and they realize they’ve got the same hair, not to mention the same accessores, and anders coughs and whistles and wrinkles up his nose and duncan glances somewhere else and karl never ever ever lets them live it down, ever? and in revenge one night they convince him it’s a good idea to piece his ear and…” well, then it becomes less of a question and more of a prolonged, very happy daydream. it’s a complicated thing to ask, but i find myself contemplating it frequently, whenever hawkeward does these amazing damn things.
I will always reblog Karl, especially if they are followed by Spicyshimmy’s thoughts on the subject. <3
Dearest Dragon Age Fans: HAWKE-ULES
I require your help.
I remember a meme going around, Hawke-ules, a combination of Hawke and Disney’s Hercules, with the companions as the Muses. At one point, I saw a few verses of Zero to Hero, re-written for the DA2 cast.
I recall “Bless my soul, Hawke was on a roll, person of the week in every Kirkwall city poll,” and that’s about it.
If there is more that someone’s already done, please share this with me. :3 I want to ensure they get the proper writing credit, and if there isn’t much more, I will take on the JOYFUL DUTY of writing it. :D
I desire this for reasons. Musical reasons. I think you will enjoy.